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dwelling of duels

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Deidre I didn't stop talking to you on aim to diss you or out of anger. You were mean to me at first but then you got nicer to me (strike out) to me. I don't know if you could tell if i had slash have a crush on you at the time. i still do have a crush on you. i don't know if you realized that you were starting to let your guard down slash tough girl persona 3 down some causing you to get nervous. I thought we were starting to connect more and more. You may or may not have felt the same way. I think you realized the connection was growing. With that your defences went up stronger than before. You started being straight out mean. Not just the usual stuff. It was more directed and focused to the point where it hurt. Normally I don't let things get to me but that all changed. What changed was that you softened up and was being nice. I am sorry if I was crowding or cramping your style. I am sorry if I got too close for comfort. Rejection always hurts and is almost unexpected. After you started being mean when you had become nice felt like rejection. You may not have even realized you were doing it. It hurt and I stuck around as long as I could parenthesis on aim end parenthesis. I stopped I M ing you when it seemed like you would be mean no matter what I did. I wanted to give you space that you seemed to be requesting parenthesis perhaps subconciously end parenthesis. I thought maybe you would I M me when you wanted to talk to me. That is when I said I wasn't going to hug you at all at MAG fest. I Meant it. I wanted to give you all the possible space you could use. A week or so ago when you got caught in the middle of that fight. In that fight I kinda noticed that you missed talking to me. That was when I decided to talk to you at MAg fest if the opportunity presented itself. I was willing to see how it went. You were very nice in person. I would have told you all of this in person, but I just didn't know how to start. I will start talking to you on aim again if you are okay with that. I will try to keep it in my head that you might not ever like me in the romantic sense. I will be content with being your friend. If you don't want me to talk to you on aim just let me know when i i m you. the last thing i want to do is below.

Pie ness:
P! That's for powerful.
I! Is for intelligent.
E, as in f ing awesome
N means ness gamer
E because you're especially good at drawing dragons!
S for being sweet (but that can be our little secret)
S because you're sexy, and that's no secret

Rod Alloway the second.

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from II: Pennsylvania: Area of Sorrow, released January 1, 2014
vocal by Deirdre Fischer

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cetera Baltimore, Maryland

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